A Shore With a Better View

When the weight comes crashing from all sides and I find myself out of breath as the last shred of strength abandons me, I cease thrashing in the face of the fury of the ocean.

As more water gushes down my throat, I give in to a simple realisation that I have tried so hard to evade for a while now: I am no match for my captor. And so I close my eyes.

For a brief instant when all goes dark, instead of panicking I allow myself to be swept away by currents. I feel myself being carried, maybe somewhere faraway from these shores that have become all too familiar too me, not worried in the least that this inactive state would lead to a parting from all the privileges that are patiently waiting for me inside my little hut; being whisked away from the clamour of uncouth men and their machinations that have engulfed my neighbourhood for years is a cause for celebration.

I open my eyes when I find myself being gently laid onto a bed of soft sand, and the sight that greets me is a marvelous one: the star studded night sky. It is vibrantly alive with an essence that I am certain that I can not even describe to myself for it is nothing like what I remember from my brief visits to my hut’s window every time I tried to peak through the smog and the harsh glow of the streetlights. Out here I am able to get a clear glimpse of a great many stars, and even clouds of celestial dust of colours unimaginable.

Hours pass as I waste not a single breath, foolishly hoping that I will be able to drink in every bit of the majestic sight, for the urge to return thither to the forsaken world that I am all too familiar with has still not crept into my heart. I pray that it never does because beneath the calmness of the sea of stars I feel at home, a part of a realm more natural and truer than any I have ever known. Being able to breath in undefiled peace is a gift that I do not think that I deserve, especially while knowing deep down that I am not strong enough to take a leap and swim through the waters that I see before me; that I probably never will be.

While I lie so far away from the noise, the thought of not a single thing or a person that I have left behind crosses my mind, save but one, of you, the one whose radiance I know truly belongs up there.

I hope that one day I will find you here in this part of the cosmos just as you found me in the desolate world of noise; I hope that then I will be able to hold you close beneath the night sky.

A Much Needed Break

A thought strikes me on the head as something races past me…something that was important to me…once.

I stop and I think; being in pursuit for so long, chasing after what I didn’t have, have I pushed away all that I already had?

I am still standing still, for the first time in a while.

I wonder what truly matters.

First published on VeryContemporaryLines on 20th July, 2016.